Three very old men were sitting around the retirement home one Christmas eve. None of them had any visitors the holidays so they were used to making the most out of each other's company during this festive time of year. Inevitably the conversation turned to the age-old topic of what each of them would wish for if they had only one wish for Christmas.

The first old man said, "Well, if I had only one wish it would be to have a good pee every morning. None of this standing around for hours and doing nothing but dribbling! I'd just like to have a good pee like I had in the good old days."

The second old man said, "Boy, that is a good wish. For my wish I would like to be able to have a good crap every morning. No more of this constant struggling and sometimes going for days with nothing. I'd just like to have a good crap like I had in the good old days."

Smiling, the third old man says, "Well, guys. I guess I am blessed. I don't have either of those problems. Why, every morning at precisely 7:15 on the button I start the day off with a piss like a race horse. I follow that up at precisely 7:16 with a good, sold bowel movement. You can set your watches by it, everything with my plumbing still works like it did in the good old days."

The first two old men look at each other and ponder the third man's good fortune for a moment. Finally one replies, "Boy you sure lucky. We envy you. But you still need to decide what you would wish for if you had only one Christmas wish."

The third old man thinks for a minute then finally says, "Well, I just wish I could wake up before 7:15!!!"

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