• In a New York Restaurant
    Customers who find our waitresses rude ought to see the manager.

  • In a LA dance hall
    Good clean dancing every night but Sunday.

  • In Florida maternity ward
    No children allowed.

  • In the offices of a loan company
    Ask about our plans for owning your home.

  • In a toy department
    Five Santa Clauses, no waiting.

  • In a Maine shop
    Our motto is to give our customers the lowest possible prices and workmanship.

  • On a military base
    restricted to unauthorized personal.

  • On a display of `You are my one and only valentine cards
    now available in multi-pack.

  • In downtown Boston
    Callahan tunnel / No end.

  • In a window of a general store
    Why go elsewhere and be cheated when you can come right here?

  • In a Maine restaurant
    Open 7 days a week and weekends.

  • In a New Jersey Restaurant
    Open 11 AM to 11 PM Midnight.

  • In a Pennsylvania cemetery
    Persons are prohibited from picking flowers from any but their own graves...

  • On the grounds of a private school
    No trespassing without permission.

  • In a library
    Blotter paper will no longer be available until the public stops taking it away.

  • On a Tennessee Highway
    Take notice, when this sign is under water, this road is impassable.

  • On a movie marquee
    Now playing ADAM AND EVE with a cast of thousands...

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