- How do you catch a unique rabbit?
You 'neek up on it. (Unique)
- How do you catch a tame rabbit?
Tame way, you 'neek up on it.
- What do you call a cow with no legs?
- What do you get when you cross a cow and a dog?
- Why do cows wear bells?
Because their horns don't work.
- How do you recognize a dogwood tree?
By its bark.
- What goes up and never goes down?
- Hickory dickory dock
Three mice ran up the clock
The clock struck one
And the other two escaped with minor injuries.
- What gets bigger the more you take from it?
- Why do firemen wear RED suspenders?
To hold up their pants. Duh.
- Why did the chicken cross the playground?
To get to the other slide.
- Why did the chicken cross the road?
To prove to the armadillo that it could be done.
- What do you call a chicken that crosses the road twice without taking a bath?
A dirty double crosser.
- Why did the chicken only cross the road halfway?
It wanted to lay it on the line.
- Why did the fox cross the road?
It was after that chicken!
- What's the difference between boogers and broccoli?
Kid's don't eat broccoli.
- Where does a Horse go when he gets sick?
- What did the monkey say when he put his tail on the Railroad tracks?
It won't be long now!
- What goes "ooo, oooo, oooo?"
A cow with no lips.
- Why did the bicycle fall down?
It was too tired. (two tired)
- What has four wheels and flies?
A trash truck.
- First Person, running around frantically waving arms:
"It's all around me, it's all around me!"
Second Person watching First Person: "What's all around you?"
First Person, calmly: "My belt, of course!"
- What's black and white and red all over?
1. A zebra with a sunburn.
2. A newspaper.
3. An embarassed penguin.
- Where does an 800-pound gorilla sleep?
Anywhere he wants.
- Where did the sheep go to get a hair cut?
The baa-baa shop.
- What time is it when you have to go to the dentist?
- What does a 300 pound canary say?
(Use a really deep voice and say), "Tweet!"
- What does a 500 pound canary say?
(Use a really deep voice and say), "Here, Kitty Kitty!"
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