This is one of those days when people deserve a chuckle. All of us have endured the confusion of traffic accidents and tried to summarize on those confusing insurance forms in a few words or less, exactly what happened. The following was published by Tilden, Canada's foremost homegrown car rental business for internal distribution. These summaries were actually submitted when police asked for a brief statement on how a particular accident occurred.

  1. "Coming home, I drove into the wrong house and collided with a tree I don't have".

  2. "The other car collided with mine without giving warning of its intentions".

  3. "A pedestrian hit me and went under my car".

  4. "The guy was all over the roads I had to swerve a number of times before I hit him".

  5. "I pulled away from the side of the road, glanced at my mother-in-law and headed over the embankment".

  6. "As I backed out of the driveway, the gentleman struck me on my backside. He then went to rest in the bush with just his rear end showing".

  7. "I had been driving my car for forty years when I fell asleep at the wheel and had an accident".

  8. "The accident occurred when I was attempting to bring my car out of a skid by steering it into the other vehicle".

  9. "I was on my way to the doctor with rear end trouble when my universal joint gave way causing me to have an accident".

  10. "I was taking my canary to the hospital. It got loose in the car and flew out the window. The next thing I saw was his rear end and there was a crash".

  11. "As I approached the intersection, a stop sign suddenly appeared in a place where no stop sign had ever been before".

  12. "I was unable to stop in time to avoid the accident. To avoid hitting the bumper of the car in front, I struck the pedestrian". "My car was legally parked as it backed into the other vehicle".

  13. "I told the police that I was not injured, but on removing my hat, I found that I had a fractured skull".

  14. "I was sure the old fellow would never make it to the other side of the roadway when I struck him".

  15. "When I saw I could not avoid a collision, I stepped on the gas and crashed into the other car".

  16. "The pedestrian had no idea which way to go, so I ran him down".

  17. "The indirect cause of the accident was a little guy in a small car with a big mouth".

  18. "I saw the slow moving, sad faced old gentleman as he bounced off the hood of my car".

  19. "I was thrown from my car as it left the road". I was later found in a field by some stray cows".

  20. "The accident occurred when the right front door of a car came around the corner without signalling".

  21. "The telephone pole was approaching fast". I was attempting to swerve out of its path when it struck my front end".

  22. "No one was to blame for the accident but it never would have happened if the other driver had been alert".

  23. "I was unable to stop in time and my car crashed into the other vehicle. The driver and passengers then left immediately for a vacation with injuries".

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