"Good pitching will always stop good hitting and vice versa."
"I made up my mind, but I made it up both ways."
"The secret of managing is to keep the guys who hate you away from the guys who are undecided."
"All right, everybody line up alphabetically according to height."
"Most of the people my age (75) are dead. You could look it up."
"With the salary I get here, I'm so hollow and starving that I'm
liable to explode like a light bulb if I hit the ground too hard."
"I was such a dangerous hitter I even got intentional walks in batting practice."
"They brought me up to the Brooklyn Dodgers, which at that time was in Brooklyn."
"Take those fellows over to that other diamond.
I want to see if
they can play on the road."
"Jerry Lumpe looks like the best hitter in the world until you put him in the lineup."
"It's like I used to tell my barber.
Shave and a haircut but
don't cut my throat. I may want to do that myself."
"What's the secret to platooning? There's not much to it.
a right-hand hitter against a left-hand pitcher and a left-hand
hitter against a right-hand pitcher
and on cloudy days you use a fastball pitcher."
"People ask me, 'Casey, how can you speak so much when you don't
talk English too good?'
Well, I've been invited to Europe, and I
say, 'They don't speak English over there too good, either'."
"Now there's three things you can do in a baseball game: you can
win or you can lose or it can rain."
"There comes a time in every man's life and I've had plenty of them."
"Old-timers' weekends and airplane landings are alike. If you can
walk away from them, they're successful."
"When I played in Brooklyn, I could go to the ballpark for a
But now I live in Pasadena, and it costs me
fifteen or sixteen dollars to take a cab to Glendale.
If I was a
young man, I'd study to become a cabdriver."
"I stayed up last night and watched the Republican Convention all
I watched all of them talk, and listened to them and
seen them and I'm not interested in politics.
If you watch them
and listen to them you can find out why you're not."
"The way our luck has been lately, our fellows have been getting
hurt on their days off."
"Once, someone in Washington gave me a picture to autograph and I
wrote, 'Do good in school.'
I look up, this guy is seventy-eight years old."
"I love signing autographs. I'll signing anything but veal
cutlets. My ball-point pen slips on veal cutlets."
"Kansas City wasn't the fun spot in my day that it is now."
"Look at Bobby Richardson.
He doesn't drink, he doesn't smoke, he
he doesn't stay out late, and he still can't hit 250."
"Whenever I decided to release a guy, I always had his room
searched first for a gun.
You couldn't take any chances with some
of them birds."
Click -- BACK -- in your Browser to return to alphabet letter.
Click -- Finlay's Funnies -- to return to main index page.